Time difference

#throwback

I’m stuck home alone with Maternal Grandma while the parents are in the States. It’s Dad’s birthday. And Grandma is very insistent on wishing her son-in-law on his birthday. And thus begins the trauma.

At 12 pm.
Grandma: oh! Today’s your dad’s birthday!
Me: I know. It’s 1 am of the day before now.
Grandma: oh. Okay. So shall we call him?
Me: in 8 hours. They sleep in till 9 am.
Grandma: oh. Okay.

At 2 pm.
Grandma: shall we call your dad now?
Me: what? No! It’s…. 3 am there. We can call at 8 pm our time. That’s in 6 hours.
Grandma: oh. Okay.

At 4 pm.
Grandma: shall we call your dad now?
Me: no..it’s…. Sigh. No. Okay? It’s not morning yet.
Grandma: what?? It’s 4 in the afternoon!
Me: for us, yes! Not for them!
Grandma: oh. Okay.

At 4:30 pm.
Grandma: shall we call your dad now?
Me: no!
Grandma: oh. Okay.

At 5 pm.
Grandma: shall we call your dad now?
Me: no!
Grandma: oh. Okay.

At 5:30 pm.
Grandma: now?
Me: no!
Grandma: oh. Okay.

At 6 pm.
Grandma opens her mouth.
Me: no!
Grandma shuts her mouth.

At 6:30 pm.
Grandma looks at me.
Me: sigh. Look. It’s still night in that country. Across the seven seas. You know? They. Are. Still. SLEEPING. We’ll call when its 8 o’ clock here. Then it will be 9 o’ clock there.
Grandma thinks for a moment: will it be 9 o’ clock in the morning or 9 in the evening for them?
Me: just…..don’t talk to me anymore, OK?

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