Terms and conditions

#chatswithparents #chatswithpeople #8
Mum: have you posted the legal disclaimer? Else Facebook owns all your data.
Me: Facebook already owns my ass, attention and time so what’s the big deal?

Mum: chee don’t use that word.
Me: what, attention?
Mum: hmph. Listen you have to post that legal disclaimer that says you don’t give Facebook permission
Me: to own my ass?

Mum: abbah! Just post the legal disclaimer, it’s on my wall.
Me: this is another ploy to get me to befriend you. Not happening.

Mum: sheesh. Being your mother is trauma enough. Just post the legal disclaimer.
Me: mum, that is not legal. It’s a status change. You could put plans to blow up stuff there and it wouldn’t be legal.

Mum: but all my friends are putting it up and now their data is safe?
Me: you really think fb is going to go throw allllll your statuses to check ‘ah ok this lady has legally covered her ass’? No. By creating your account you’ve agreed to whatever terms and conditions they have. What’s your big worry anyway?

Mum: what if they steal my photo and use it on internet banking?
Me: (face cracked by huuuuuge smile) wow. Yeah I never thought of that. Which photo did you use for internet banking?

Mum: I’ll ask your dad.
Me: yes. Preferably when I’m around.
Mum: ya. Then he can also post the legal status.


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